It’s Yours (be cool)

It’s been said that if you chase a butterfly, it will flee. But if you turn your attention elsewhere, it just might land on you. Likewise, everyone is chasing their dreams like they are butterflies. And with similar results. It seems the more frantically we pursue our goals, the further away in time they are driven from us, perhaps never to be realized.

Certainly, dreams are worth pursuing. But the many problems encountered along the way can result from an exaggerated use of our energies. The facts are the facts. Tremendous psychological exertion can only bring about fatigue, discouragement, and desperation. Notice that when we’re passionate about our goals we’re often hurried, impersonal, opportunistic and proud. We’re playing ourselves. As a result, our behavior will be erratic. Consciously or not, we push people away and repel opportunities to realize our objectives. That is why I started with the analogy of chasing the butterfly.

With respect to making elusive dreams land in our hands, consider this. Sometimes to get what we desire we need to refrain from any action at all for a period of time. I know this sounds counterintuitive, but it’s an important observation. The point here is that it’s crucial to recognize patience and humility as vital for satisfying our sense of accomplishment. We should know enough to know when we don’t have the know how to solve certain riddles (an individual who knows anything at all knows that they have a lot to learn). In fact, we might fare better if and when we let things resolve themselves of their own accord. In many cases that might be the most adequate approach.

But too often, we stand in our own way. More often than not because as thinking creatures we have a need to control things, even time. Yet oftentimes it is wise to let the day get away from us. Sometimes we should let time arrange circumstances its own way. With this strategy, you might see that things can be organized in a manner most convenient for you without any screwing around on your part. Therefore, don’t be so quick to grab your trusty tools and start tinkering with the machinery of providence.

Of course, expect problems and challenges. But appreciate them as opportunities for learning, growth, and refinement. Have a little patience and be cool. You’ll get what you want if you learn when and when not to apply pressure to matters. Give time and nature permission to make impressions on your life with their own skills. The results will undoubtable please you.

Here’s a simple example of what I mean by sabotaging our objectives with unnecessary pressure. This may sound silly, but by golly, I love chocolate chunk cookies. Recently, they were on my mind. So, I planned to visit a store where I could purchase a large container of the perfect ones for a fair price. But I would be busy all week. I had no time to get to the store. I had to wait. But I didn’t. I squeezed my cookie adventure into my schedule although I knew it wasn’t the smartest thing to do. I just couldn’t get those damn cookies out of my mind. I headed to the store salivating as I imagined gorging myself on the sweets of my dreams.

I hovered over the cookies, staring down any and every man with likeminded fiendishness and the audacity to approach the coveted area. At last, I shrewdly chose a container of cookies with way more chocolate chunks in them than any of the other containers. I paid for my guilty pleasures and placed my container in a small ‘Have a Nice Day’ bag with another item. Then to make certain my precious wouldn’t be ruined by bouncing all around as I transported them home, I took further steps. I tied the handles of the shopping bag tightly together. That eliminated any possibility of my precious moving around too much as I walked along. Just as I planned, the container had no room to shift or change positions in the bag. But guess what?

Because they were so tightly confined, the cookies were constantly pressing against their container and directly absorbing unnecessary shock throughout my travels home. When I opened the container, I saw that over half the cookies had been pulverized. They were a heap of crumbs. If I had not tried to restrict their movement, they would have been able to reposition themselves and adjust which would have taken the pressure off of them. My evening snack would have been way more satisfying if I had let nature take its course. My point? Let’s not be so rigid in our determination to fix things our way.

Nevertheless, do not mistake this as a call to inaction. Obviously, you have to act to accomplish anything. Even to pick a flower. But we should measure and mete out our efforts in reasonable doses. For instance, if you rudely uproot a flower, it won’t come out as nice as it would if you would only use patience and care.

Therefore, we should learn when the time is best for possessing the apple of our eye. With patience time is auxiliary. With time and patience as consistent supports, there is minimal chaos or mismanagement. Therefore, there is less doubt and anxiety. In turn, there is less pressure, and no loss of integrity to the structure of our objective. And more importantly no loss of our own integrity as we navigate life.

Of course, it’s inevitable that we’ll sometimes be confronted with things beyond our control. Nevertheless, anything we are striving for can be had when our actions are measured by faith in ourselves, humility, and patience. These virtues directly counteract the vicissitudes of impulsiveness, pride and time, all of them always eager to make you lose your cool. So, I’m all for taking a step back when it’s needed. Such a simple gesture can neutralize the noise of the mind. It can help us forego a tendency to hastily conceive of reality according to established habits of mind. The latter again demonstrative of our need to be in control. And why not? Without established methods for dealing with challenges we would feel powerless. And understandably so.

Nevertheless, good or bad fortune will arrive in life regardless of our mental disposition. And extreme misfortune can dumb down our problem-solving abilities. Therefore, it’s important that we do what we can to have a cool personality. It’s a sure way of attracting good fortune by simply not being a good luck repellent. With proper composure, you won’t go without whatever you’re hoping for.

And understand that patience is the key to staying cool when working toward your goals. Just look at Morgan Freeman. He was almost three hundred years old when he landed his first role as an actor! Obviously, that took some patience. Now he’s all over the place.

If you need someone to talk to you can always call the Mental Health Hotline at 866-903-3787. Or if you feel like a danger to yourself, call 988.